A Different Kind of Baby Book
Yesterday marked the year anniversary of finding out that Finnegan was growing inside of me. I remember, vividly, the shock I felt when I saw that positive pregnancy test. With Asher I knew I was pregnant before I even took the test. It was so obvious, I had all the typical pregnancy signs. Finnegan, imagine that, was a surprise.
It was a Wednesday night and I was exhausted. We were in the middle of a pitch at work that was killing all of us. The days were so long. The team ate takeout for breakfast, lunch and dinner in the office and barely saw our families. I felt terrible but I attributed it to the 16+ hour days working and the greasy food we were eating for each meal. On a whim, and without any other signs other than exhaustion, I peed on a stick. There it was, my big fat positive pregnancy test. I was elated, we wanted this for our family and especially for Asher.
From then on I did all the normal pregnancy things but this time much more relaxed. I knew this role and it wasn't too long ago that I had been in it so I was excited. The books, the nursery prep, the big brother class, the works. We were so ready for this baby, or so we thought.
Having a medically complex baby changes so much. I mean, yeah there is the obvious stuff but it changes little things too. Like what you track. Instead of counting how many weeks or months old he is, I am tracking his blood pressure trends, ins and outs, access lines and days on ECMO. Rather than documenting his first trip to the zoo we are counting the days he's been on the transplant list. It's weird, but it's our normal now. Finn doesn't have a baby book, whereas Asher had every move and smile documented in a blue little calendar. We don't even have Finn's footprint from birth, how horrible is that?
In honor of Finn's unique situation I want to document some of his, well, accomplishments we will call them. And in true hospital form, we will do it by the numbers.
Finn By the Numbers:
- 366 days since positive pregnancy test
- 133 days Earth side
- 68 days in the hospital
- 65 days at home
- 55 days tube fed
- 41 ml of breast milk per hour
- 30 days on ECMO
- 26 days on the UNOS transplant list
- 19 weeks old
- 7 hospital rooms
- 3 PICC lines
- 1 Broviac
- 1 PEG/J tube
- Birth - 1.13.17
- Admitted for TTN - 1.14.17
- HCM diagnosis - 1.15.17
- Discharge from NICU - 1.24.17
- First smile - 2.17.17
- First coos - 2.27.17
- Readmitted to CVICU - 3.29.17
- Last time breastfeeding 3.31.17
- Respiratory support, milrinone, PICC line - 4.3.17
- Last time holding - 4.25.17
- Broviac placement - 4.25.17
- PEG/J tube - 4.26.17
- Placed on ECMO - 4.27.17
- Transfered to Mayo - 5.1.17
- Listed - 5.1.17
- Extubated himself - 5.3.17
- Tried breastfeeding (on ECMO) - 5.20.17
Now we wait for the most important date. The date when he gets his gift. I can't wait to add that to his baby book!
May 26, 2017